Lately, I’ve been finding myself telling people over and over again about a few books I’ve been reading, so I thought I’d share them with you:

1. Have you ever felt like you were living in the wrong place? Like you just don’t really belong where you are? Maybe the people are somehow fundamentally different from you, or maybe you just can’t get your career off the ground? There may very well be a good reason for this — it’s not necessarily you. In "Who’s Your City?", Richard Florida explains why where you live may be one of the most important choices in your life, with his reasoning in very clear graphic form. Some places are just where you have to be for certain professions. Face it — if you’re in finance, you’d better live in New York or London. And psychogeography really exists — people really are different in different locations. The book explained to me why I knew at a deep level, visiting as a child, that I had to move to the Bay Area. Turns out that my personality is much more sympatico with those here than in the New York metro area.

Florida also has a website, http://creativeclass.com/whos_your_city/, but it will make more sense after you’ve read the book.

2. "The Brain that Changes Itself", by Norman Doidge, M.D., describes how the brain changes in response to differing stimuli. It discusses, in no particular order, treatments for autism spectrum disorders, phantom limb pain, how to ward off age-related memory loss and much more.

The book discusses how incremental rewards work best to encourage practice -- and practice is generally how the brain changes. This convinced me to have the participants in my class last weekend check in with themselves after each exercise we did, and report the changes that happened on a subjective scale of 0-10. Wow! I don’t know how rewarding each check-in was for the participants, because they were experiencing the changes, but it was really rewarding and motivating for me! Because I wasn’t personally experiencing the changes, and because there were too many people for me to personally monitor them in the way that I would with a private client, I needed another sort of feedback. This was perfect! I watched as the group made progress from one exercise to the next even though each participant didn’t necessarily have positive results with each process. Not only did I want to keep going to see what would happen after the next exercise, but I also want to teach the training again — soon!

3. Want to convince your child to eat spinach? Or convince your company to adopt a new policy or procedure? "Made to Stick", by the brothers, Chip Heath and Dan Heath, one of whom is a professor at Stanford Business School, tells you how, in a simple, clear and entertaining fashion. They really practice what they preach! They say the key to writing convincing copy is

Simple
Unexpected
Concrete
Credible
Emotional
Stories

And back that up with lots of real world examples. I know I’m going to try it!

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I recommend getting these books from your local library (saves trees and money), but if you want to buy any of them, could you please do it from my website, which will send you to Amazon? Go to http://www.888-4-hollis.com pages/resources/recommended-readings.php, and just click on the title that interests you. Check out the other books, too while you’re there.

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Now for the book that’s only okay. Oprah has been leading internet classes that are reaching literally millions of people around the world 9whenaired and as downloads), with Eckhart Tolle. I applaud them for this. They even open each segment with a brief meditation. Imagine that, 700,000 people meditating together all over the world!

And there is a lot to recommend Tolle’s book, "A New Earth". For example, Tolle has a very cool way of getting people aware of their energy bodies — he asks you to feel the aliveness in your hand when it isn’t touching anything, and then expand that to your whole body. (Of course, he’s much more complete in his directions.) Try it now!

However, and this is why I am only rating this book so-so, he spends an entire chapter on what he calls the “pain-body”. Basically, he is agglomerating all of our less-than-helpful beliefs and memories (what we’d call parts in NLP), into one global “pain-body”, which “feeds on negativity” and “seeks more pain”. Yes, there is negativity in the world, some individual, some cultural and historical. But labeling it a “pain body” feels really disempowering to me, like there’s a demon living inside me that will be virtually impossible to eradicate (because what else do you do with a demon?). And when you make all the less-than-helpful beliefs into one giant entity, with a life of its own, you can’t ask what it’s positive intention is, without getting the answer that it wants what will help itself survive. So — chunk it down — deal with each individual issue as it comes up, as an indication of something to be healed.

Of course, Tolle suggests that the way out is awareness, in a very Buddhist way, which is fine. His first publisher, Marc Allen, describes Tolle as basically sitting on a park bench for a couple of years, non-functional, so I guess if you sit still long enough, just being aware, you’ll get to enlightenment. (A reader corrected me to say that he sat on the park bench after enlightenment. Great! So okay, perhaps he got there another way.) However, those of us on the “householders path” (an ancient and honored tradition of using our everyday lives as an expression and exploration of our spirituality), can’t sit still for a couple of years. We must use our jobs and relationships and experiences to get to enlightenment. Furthermore, I think there are much better and quicker tools for healing, including NLP, EFT, and hypnotherapy, among others.

I was teaching Hypnocoaching last weekend to a group in Oakland, when a student’s question started me on a rant about a pet peeve, which is the very concept of gremlins, demons, or self-sabotage. This is important, so I’m sharing it with you.

We all have emotional baggage -- internal things that get in the way of us creating what we want in our lives and businesses. Perhaps you’ve heard these referred to as ‘gremlins’ or ‘demons’.

And we’ve all had the experience of wanting something, and just as we get really close to achieving it, it slips away. Maybe you’ve had the experience more than once. And then you’ve wondered, “what’s wrong with me?” So someone handed you the idea that you could be sabotaging yourself. This sets up the idea that you could deliberately, intentionally be stopping yourself from getting what you want. Nothing could be further from the truth.

What’s actually happening in both these cases is that part of you just wants something different -- and perhaps incompatible.

Just labeling these admittedly less-than-helpful parts of ourselves in these negative ways is doing yourself a disservice. Why?

First, whatever is stopping you from getting what you choose is a part of you. And you don’t react particularly well to someone calling you a nasty name, do you? If I called you an idiot, would it make you want to cooperate with me? No. And calling these parts of yourself nasty names doesn’t make them want to cooperate, either. Making yourself wrong by saying ‘I’m sabotaging myself’, just makes you feel bad about yourself, which makes the situation worse, without offering a solution.

Let’s use my client, Stephanie, as an example. She desperately wants to “take her business to the next level”, but can’t make herself do any of the things that she knows will get here there. She had labeled the part of her that is stopping her a ‘gremlin’, which set up a struggle with it.

What do you do instead of using these destructive labels?

First, recognize that any part of you that is getting in the way of what you (think you) want actually has a positive purpose. Perhaps this part of you was created at another time, in other circumstances, to get you what you needed or wanted at the time, and has outlived its usefulness. Or perhaps it wants something good for you now, that you’re not aware of, or that seems to conflict with what you want consciously.

Some discussion uncovered that both of Stephanie’s parents were very successful — but they worked all the time, so that she felt ignored and unloved. So the part of her that was stopping her was created when she was about 5, and it was worried that if she were successful, she’d never have any time for herself or her family. So, of course, it wanted her to avoid business success, so that she could have a happy family life, and both she and her kids would feel loved.

Second, honor and thank that part of you for doing such a good job. If it were sleeping on the job, it wouldn’t have come up! And it’s much more likely to cooperate if you are respectful of it. Again, if I say to you, “I honor what a good job you’re doing, and could you please just do your job a little differently?”, you‘re more likely to work with me than if I call you a “pea-brained a**hole”, right?

Instead of calling this part of her a ‘gremlin’, Stephanie thanked this part of herself for doing such a good job.

Third, figure out what its positive purpose is, and then help it get that, in a way that works for the rest of you. This is often a sort of internal negotiation.

Stephanie told this part of her that she was grateful for its desire for her to take care of herself and spend plenty of time with her family. And then she explained that it really didn’t work for the rest of her, and in fact, was getting in the way of her taking care of her family — financially. It understood and relaxed. She promised it that she’d make sure to hire people to take some of the burden of a successful business away from her, so that she’d have time to relax alone and time to hang out with her husband and kids. In the end, the part of her agreed, and then also agreed to remind her with a particular feeling when she wasn’t keeping up her end of the agreement.

What parts of you are getting in your way? If you want help identifying, making friends with and working with the parts of you formerly known as ‘gremlins’, call me at 888-4-hollis! Stop the struggle! You can do this. With me as your guide, it’s quicker and easier than you think!

And if you want to learn my processes for doing this, come to my next training -- in November, '08!

Maybe you know the feeling: you’re really good at what you do, and successful, too, but it just feels... empty. You have this good job (or business) but you feel like the only reason you show up is to pay the bills. You used to love what you do, but now you have to keep reminding yourself why you’re doing it. You’re racing your motor (work to churn out, people to see, presentations to give — it’s endless), and that only makes the wheels spin faster (and yes, you do meet all the deadlines), which digs the rut deeper. You’re in a pretty good place, but you’re going nowhere — and going there fast, and maybe burning out the motor at the same time.

I have a few clients like that right now, men and women both. They’re all experts at different facets of marketing, mid-life, quite successful. Each is on his or her own personal growth path, though the paths are as varied as the people: Buddhism, Judaism, Christianity, non-denominational spirituality, Masters Degrees in psychology or related fields, certificates in different types of healing.

My rule is that when something shows up 3 or more times in quick succession, it’s time to look at it. And since I’m quite clear that this lesson isn’t for me, it must be for you!

What you’re telling me is that success for its own sake just doesn’t satisfy any more. Because I’ve been working with marketers, success is, in an odd way, proof of their value — if you’re successful, that means you’re good at marketing, which makes a prima facie case that others should listen to you (and pay you) to tell them how to succeed. The money, the trappings, though they’re great, don’t mean all that much. Even helping other people succeed and get money and trappings, just seems pretty empty. So your success becomes a trap — success begets success begets success — hey, this wheel pretty much turns on its own momentum now! But your deepest need to do something else gnaws at you constantly.

Here’s something else I know from working with people for more than 15 years. If you don’t listen to that sense that it’s time to shift, the shift will come to you, often in a less than pleasant way. Perhaps you’ll get sick, so you’ll sit still and pay attention. Maybe you’ll lose your biggest client. Maybe you’ll lose your job. In fact, I met an abbot once, the ‘father’ of a religious order, who opened up to me, and told me he was really sick of his job, tired of running the monastery. I told him that if he didn’t instigate a change, the change would come to him. And he didn’t do anything, because he felt secure. The monks had taken vows of obedience, and he had no superior. The monks got together and rebelled and he was out on his ear!

So pay attention to that nagging sensation that something has to change. But what to do?

Here are a few ideas, presented in no particular order. Pick and choose the ones that work for you:

• Ask yourself, what is frustrating me? Create a vision of your own future that eliminates, or at least works around, all your current frustrations, while incorporating all the things you love (and probably take for granted) now, and move toward that.
• Create a vision for how you would like the world to be, and let that guide you in shifting your job or business, so that your larger vision for the world gives meaning to your daily activities. If you want a sustainable future for society, shift your job or business to support that, perhaps by actively seeking ‘green’ clients.
  
• If you’re feeling stifled, limited, or undervalued, then shift your business focus to something related to what you’re already good at, but that uses other skills you’re not using now. If you have lots of people skills, use them in HR or recruiting for a marketing firm.
  
• Start a side business doing something you love to do, that seems more important than what you’re doing now. If connecting people to each other seems more important than teaching them how to do search engine optimization, start a networking group. Play around with business models till you find one that will eventually support you so you can stop what you now think of as your main job or business.
  
• Get help! There are coaches out there (including me) who have processes to help you clarify what you’re choosing to create.

Siddhi (Sanskrit:सिद्धिः; siddhiḥ) is a Sanskrit word that literally means "accomplishment", "attainment", or "success". It is also used as a term for spiritual power (or psychic ability). The term is used in that sense in Hinduism and Tantric Buddhism. These spiritual powers supposedly vary from relatively simple forms of clairvoyance to being able to levitate, to be present at various places at once, to become as small as an atom, to materialize objects, to have access to memories from past lives, and more.
                                                                                                                                  - from Wikipedia

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Last August, I went to the “Ambassador to the Universe” training held by Dr. Stephen Greer, up at Mt. Shasta. Dr. Greer, who opened TM centers for the Maharishi before he became an M.D., specializing in emergency medicine, is an amazing clairvoyant, channel, etc., as well as being very tough and focused on helping humanity change its future to one of sustainability. (You can check out his websites, www.disclosureproject.org and www.aero2012.org .)

Many amazing things happened at the workshop (which I wrote about at  http://10minutesaday.blogspot.com/2007/09/multiplier-effect-part-ii.html ). But something else happened that I didn’t mention, because it didn’t seem that important at the time. Dr. Greer did a puja and gave each of us our personal mantra. Of course, it was the same mantra for each of us, one of the four standard TM ones, but with a difference. Dr. Greer had channeled that those mantras were originally sung, and that when the notes that went with the words were lost, much of the power of the mantras was lost, as well. And he had channeled the ‘tune’ for one of the mantras. This is the one he gave each of us, to be sung to ourselves.

After I got back from Mt. Shasta, someone in his office emailed me an .mp3 file of the mantra, sung over and over with a background of Tibetan bowls. I put this on my iPod, both on its own and as a background for my personal affirmations. I began to listen to one or the other every day while I walked. And after a while, I noticed that the mantra generated an energy that swirled around me, sort of like a controlled tornado, though with a difference — the energy seemed to swirl both in and out simultaneously, in the same direction.

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In December, my husband and I hosted a friend, Mark Macy, for a couple of free lectures on his specialty, instrumental transcommunication, that is, using electronic instruments to communicate with the ‘dead’. He uses a tool called a Luminator to make this communication easier. Mark was kind enough to open up the Luminator for me, and it appears to generate an electromagnetic field at a particular frequency (though I couldn’t tell you which frequency). This field felt so strong to me that when he first turned on the machine, it felt like I had put my finger in a light socket! But he turned it down, and I got used to it. (For more info on those lectures, with photos, please go to http://10minutesaday.blogspot.com/2007/12/how-psychics-have-fun-part-3.html ).

As I got used to it, something amazing happened. I was 'shown' what happens when you 'die'. I did not have the experience of the tunnel that most near-death experiencers describe (not that I was near death in any way), but doors opened from my heart and I came out on a beautiful landscape, which I was told was different for each person. After a few moments of enjoying that, I was showered with a beautiful green light that permeated me, and then a beautiful yellow or golden light that did the same. After a while, that faded away, and I was back in the beautiful landscape, but this time, there were thousands of 'people' there. (I think this is the welcoming party that everyone talks about.) I was at a distance, hovering in the sky, looking at the assembled group, but I noticed that if I asked for someone, they'd sort of come to the front of the group, or perhaps I zoomed in to them. I was given to understand that in a way, this 'party' is somewhat holographic, as if each soul sent a hologram of a part of itself that I would recognize, not necessarily that the whole soul was there.

Then it occurred to me that I could use the technique to ask my higher self to come to the front of the group. It worked! And I had a conversation with my higher self (not sure this makes sense, but oh, well). It’s apparently a great joke that my higher self, which is HUGE in some sense, has to fit into my 5’3” physical body (perhaps this explains why I’ve always wanted to be taller). So the next time I tried it, not only did I ask my higher self to come to the fore, but I also walked into my higher self, so that I’m inside it/me.

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I was at a business building workshop recently, and had a couple of amazing experiences. First, as I did a pair exercise with another woman, looking into her eyes, I watched as her 3rd eye popped open (briefly) and later, watched iridescent wings unfold from her back. She said she felt quite good, very peaceful, but wasn’t aware of these things. But I don’t think I’m making them up, because I was pretty surprised. The word, “Namaste” (roughly translated as “the god in me salutes the god in you”), has a much more literal meaning for me now!

But here’s the amazing thing. After the formal classes, we were offered an optional session of “being coaching”. Basically, this was role playing on stage, with the trainer periodically stopping the action to coach the participants. I was up on stage quite late on Saturday night (10:45 PM). Most of the group had gone home, so there were perhaps 25 people left. There was a really nice group field from the work we’d all done supporting each other that day and in the ‘being coaching’ session. Another woman and I were being coached, and the coach, along with the audience said to me, ‘there’s something wild about you and we want to see more of it.’ Well, there is absolutely nothing wild about me, which I said. To which the coach replied, there’s a hurricane around you.

I know what that energy is — it’s the energy from the sung mantra. So I said I knew what it was, that it was more of a tornado, that it wasn’t me, but if everyone wanted to see more of it, that’s what they’d get. So I stood at the front  of the stage, invited my higher self to come to the fore, and sang the mantra silently to myself.

People started to cry. One woman, directly in front of me about 12 feet away, began to shake and cry. It felt quite normal and natural in my body,  and I wasn’t in trance or anything, just being me, with the mantra going, could even talk a little. It’s easy. I’m very clear that the energy isn’t mine, although it does come through me. I was pretty wired for a few hours after that, though, even though my usual bedtime is 8:30PM lately.

The next morning, I asked the woman who’d been shaking what had happened to her, she said she’d been in a lot of physical pain, and felt a cool mist rain down on her, felt the pain leave her body, and that the tears were tears of relief, joy and gratitude. Three other people, all of whom said they don’t normally see auras told me they’d seen a color around me — for two of them it was golden light behind or around me, while another saw blue above my head. Another three people asked me to come speak at their groups. When I asked what about, one woman said she didn’t care, “just do what you do”. Yet another came up to me and said, “after last night, I’d follow you anywhere.”

I’m under no illusion that I am in any way unique — this energy is available to all -- and wow, how cool is that?

Have you ever had a sore throat that just wouldn’t go away? A tennis elbow? Or some other chronic physical concern? Maybe your body is trying to tell you something deeper about what is going on. After all, mindbody is one system, and so your body expresses what is going on at an emotional level, especially if you are not consciously aware of your feelings.

I used to have sore throats all the time; in fact, a sore throat was how I knew an episode of my CFDIS (chronic fatigue immune dysfunction syndrome) was imminent. I eventually learned that a sore throat was caused, on a very real if non-physical level, by something I wasn’t saying. The words were literally sticking in my throat and making it sore. So I began to ask myself, “what am I not saying? And to whom?” When I figured out the answer to those two questions, and did something about it (either saying what I needed to say to the appropriate person, or at least imagining myself doing that), then the sore throat went away in a matter of minutes! In fact, I began to head off the worst episodes of CFIDS with this technique — I’d either stop them in their tracks or make them pretty mild and short-lived.

This is true for sudden, one off issues, too. If you’ve ever broken an ankle, for instance, you’ll probably realize that, at that time, you had an issue around moving forward and/or your direction in life. Think back to any serious medical issues you’ve ever had, or that anyone close to you has ever had, and you’ll see this sort of parallel.

So if something is not working right in your body, ask yourself what deeper issue it might represent. Think about ‘organ language’, which is the use of body parts or functions in everyday language, and see what turns up. So if you have, say, a cough, and the words, “cough it up” come to mind, ask yourself what you need to ‘cough up’ or let go of. Answer that question, and then let go — and see if the cough goes away on its own.

Here’s another resource: Louise Hay’s book, You Can Heal Your Life, has a terrific directory for this. The directory lists body parts, as well as dis-eases, along with potential meanings for them and possible affirmations to use to heal them. In my experience of using this directory with friends and clients over the years, the meanings are very good clues to what is going on at a deeper level, while the affirmations really need to be tailored to the individual.